May 2005

31 May
If you could see what I see...
I just went outside with my red sunglasses on...so beautiful. I've still yet to work out if it's my autism working on my mind since we think in a visual way, or just the glasses. Perhaps it's both.

I don't just see the vapour trails of the planes, I see the vapour trails of the clouds too. The trails they leave as they pass through the sky, and the way they slowly move, creating more trails, becoming something as complex and as beautiful as a spider's web in the dew. It's a stunning sight. Someday I'm going to rig up my digital camera to the lens of my glasses and take pictures, with the hope that perhaps you too can see what I see.

I also looked at the sun, it's beautiful on a morning like this morning. You truely see it as a burning ball of fire, not just a light in the sky. The light it creates, refracting and reflecting off the moisture of the clouds, it's almost alive! It moves, changes constantly, second to second. I know they say never look directly at the sun, even with sunglasses on, but it's never affected me. It's still one of the most beautiful, breathtaking sights you can witness.

I'm not going to talk about work today. It wasn't bad, it wasn't good, it was neutral. I did ok, Tizzy was stunning in her pace, and Malcs was fast too. 337, and out by 5:30am. Pretty good, but if I'd been a little more on my game it would have been better.

Anyway, now to call Ale. She deserves a call. I've promised her a call for so long, and I know she loves the sound of my voice, so I'll give her that rare treat of me calling. Then to sleep, and to dream.

Adios mi amigos et amigas. Vous est bon compadres en la voyage.

30 May
The business is up and running!
I finally finished coding the last page of the finished version of the business. Still not entirely happy with the layout, but that's something I can tweak later. I've added a link to the business to this Space, so hopefully I'll generate a little interest this way too.

Now begins the long hard slog of marketing the thing. Much reading required methinks!

Lazy, crazy, hazy days off
The last couple of days have been bliss. Spent most of yesterday sleeping, apart from when I got up to watch the European Grand Prix. Poor Kimi, he deserved the win! Anyway, there are plenty more Grand Prix this year, and he'll be world champion sooner or later! Oh, and one more little comment - James Allen is an idiot! He went on and on for about 5 minutes about how Raikkonen should have changed his tyre and gone for 3rd place. James - he is a racer, a professional driver. 2nd place is nothing, 3rd place is nothing, 1st is all that matters! If you are in 1st place, you don't risk dropping 2 or 3 places if you think there is even a slight chance you can keep 1st. I may not be a professional driver, but when I was younger I did a lot of go kart driving and I know that when you're in 1st place you do whatever you have to in order to stay there. I remember driving go karts in Cornwall and having possibly the slowest car on the track, but because I absolutely floored it the whole way around the 1st lap, I was in 1st place and the 2nd place guy was ridiculously faster than me. He tried everything to get first including making shortcuts, but I just drove incredibly aggressively and held onto 1st. That's the mentality you adopt.

Anyway, apart from that, I've done a little work on my site, getting it all ready for upload this afternoon. Once it's up I'll start on my marketing campaign and also start looking for new products to add to the catalogue.

So glad I didn't get a phone call last night. I had a prior engagement with Derren Brown on channel 4. His show was very good, an excellent display of showmanship, although a lot of his stuff was just basic mind reading and memory feats. Admittedly though he did go someway to revealing how his mind reading tricks worked. Useful for me.

Oh, and there is some quite hot news. Apparently someone from one of our big rival supermarkets came in the other night and were so impressed on how me and Tizzy work together and how fast we are that we've both been headhunted to work on their nightshift. The pay is better, and the benefits are better so I'm seriously considering it. Could be the only way I get to move up the ladder in Retail, since I've been explicitly told I'll never get promoted at our place...

28 May
Happiness before bed!
I was just looking over the Internet because I was bored and decided to look up the name of my business - "Muse Creighton". Out of the few entries, this blog is listed 4 times! Twice on Weblogs.com (not sure if I spelt that correctly). Anyway, I'm pretty happy about that! Must sleep now, and then resume coding the site later tonight. Never know where this happy little blog could take my business!

Tired, achey, but happy
Tonight was hell. Lyndon didn't show for reasons best known to people higher than Kev since he didn't know either. So we had Darren's pet, Ruth. We shall call her Darren's pet since she has nothing but good things to say about the man. God...gotta hate him.

Actually, all things considered, we did ok. Everything was done by 2:15am, including a round of coffees and a couple of cigarettes. Then hell arrived in a big green truck. 500 cases. I was not amused. 3 people into 500 cases does not go! But we didn't do too badly. Had a couple of cages left over, but that's nothing. Must be about 50-60 cases left. 10% or so. Day shift can handle it. I think even the facing up was probably to Darren's standards since I got no complaints after his brief store walk. So, we're pretty happy.

Right now, I think I'll have a cup of tea, or hunt for some hot chocolate have a fag and take my special blend of herbs and spices so that when I wake up I'm back in one piece, and then sleep all day. A mild dose of herbal anti-depressant should ensure that happens. Gotta love my little blend of herbal bits and bobs. I think they could even fix Humpty Dumpty!

Oh...and on a final note, anyone who wants to chat to me for the next 11 weeks...forget it! I will be totally and utterly lost in Big Brother. I'll have to quickly check my video pass still works, then just lap it up for hour upon hour. God bless broadband, Channel 4, and the crazy little people who go on Big Brother. And a little prediction from me - This series is gonna be extremely good. Possibly even better than last year...

26 May
Who do you think you are? Huh?
I am so angry. I heard last night that Malcolm made Tizzy take her collar off. Who does he think he is? The power has gone to his head! It makes me angry because I'm a firm believer in being allowed to express yourself in any way you want. If it offends someone, tough. I hate censorship, and this is what it amounts to.

It's also the fact that Malcolm is so twisted over the phantom affair me and Tizzy are so obviously having that his whole perception has gone out the window. I'm sure he's going to try and do something to me tonight. I really hope he doesn't. If he does, he'll have Original Jack to deal with. Because I am going on a little shopping trip in a while to go get all the components I need to recreate Jack properly. Not the cobbled together Jack who has been working at our store the last few days. The difference is subtle, but noticable.

Anyway, about last night. Had a great time, went down the pub, got really quite drunk, and still managed to use my latest mind trick on my friend. It worked superbly. Better than I ever imagined. I was making him get stoned without a single puff on a joint. He snapped himself out of it because it was all getting too real and he realised he was in the middle of a bar, but he was there absolutely shocked at how real it was getting, despite it all going on in his mind. I love my skills. Still gutted I can't use that particular trick on Lyndon! Love to get him sacked for being drunk on duty but not having touched a drop of alcohol.

Adios mi amigos!

25 May
Another day off!
Tonight was strange. I really don't like being alone with Malcs. The conventional part of my mind says that nothing can happen, I'm in a store, with customers, and nothing can happen to me. The autistic side disagrees, and annoyingly it usually is right.

Take this morning for example. Customers buzzing around, picking things up, getting all ready to pay, and where is Malcolm? Doing his own store walk with himself. That's not normal! You serve customers. Then again, giving customers the evil eye for flirting with Tizzy is hardly great service!

And tonight Jack and Kira were forcefully seperated because Malcolm wants Tizzy all to himself. No other person may even speak to her! However, since his interest in us and our phantom affair is rising, I'm giving him what he wants. Phantom tidbits. Nothing explicit, nothing detailed. Just what he doesn't want to hear. As the saying goes "give a man enough rope..."

Apart from that, not a lot happened. We were all done by 6-ish. Including the facing up, which Sue (who had to be manager because Senor Pete doesn't realise 7AM doesn't mean whenever I feel like it) said was very good.

And in business news, I've decided to recode the store from scratch. A fair bit of work, yes, but I wanted to add some new items, and that would also have been quite a lot of work to recode individual pages, add new pages, add new menus etc. Much easier to code like a demon and get the whole thing done in time for this afternoon to upload. And on that note, Adios!

24 May
Business is picking up
Quick little entry. Got a possible customer. Hugh wants a basic barebones system from me. So I've found one and sent him a quote. Could be very interesting if it works out!

Jack or Darren. Who wins? I decide.
I laugh. Darren met Jack tonight, and they got on as I expected. Like oil and water. Darren pointed out that I was making the canteen look untidy. So, I hung my jacket on the door as I always do. He then tried to argue that I was some kind of rebel without a clue, going against his every wish. So I argued the quite accurate fact that I forgot. He didn't believe me. If he had left it alone, he would have saved himself a lot of bother. So he again insisted I was just ignoring his wishes for some unknown rebellious reason. So I insisted that I had forgotten. Still he pressed that I was a rebel, so I insisted a touch more (too much?) that I had forgotten. He said "fine, but next time just hang it up on a hanger." Moron. Does the whole "Big I am" thing, bullies people psychologically and tries to press his points using pathetic psychological trickery. Shame it doesn't work on me...

And then there was Malcolm. He also angered Jack. Silly boy. Shouldn't do that. He asked what I was talking to Tizzy about, and then said "ok. could you actually get on with some work instead?" Ok, it was an almost valid point. However, he is slow! Painfully so. By the time I finished the dry goods, and Tizzy finished the chilled goods, he was still putting out the sandwiches. 4 bloody sandwiches to a box! He only had 20 or so boxes! It's not difficult!!!!

On that note - I rocked last night! 90 odd cases an hour! Tizzy must have done about the same because her section was about the same size as mine, and she finished at roughly the same time. Malcolm's was far smaller in every way, and he finished way after us.

So, just one more little shift before I have a day off. Hopefully I have Sunday off too. With Malcolm being back it really shouldn't be an issue. They can cope with 3 people, they have coped with 3 people for the last 2 weeks. Although if there are 4 of us, bring it on. I'll have it thrashed before anyone realises. And just wait until Thursday...Lyndon and Malcolm...my two least favourite people at work, and Jack. The delivery will be thrashed and those two will be left very red faced!

Adios mi amigos. Hora para el sueño.

23 May
Grrrrr
I'm not happy. And for once I only have myself to blame. I only managed a paltry 60 cases an hour. Not good, especially on a small delivery like 285. Yes, it may have only taken us 2 and a half hours to do, which all in all is a good showing, but it's not good enough. Not when I'm capable of getting into the high 90s.

Apart from that, not a lot else. Another 2 days of work not to look forward to. But at least the hardest shifts are over with. And Malcs is back. Hopefully since he's been well rested he'll be nice and quick again. I'm planning on getting a good sleep in. Get up relatively early, do a bit of work to my business. Also must go shopping for a PDA. And at some point I need to call Ale. She's been bugging me about calling her, so I guess I really should.

Sigh...this is not a good way to live. Work, sleep, work, sleep for 6 days in a row. The only one who's doing the same as me is Charlotte. A nice enough girl, but she strikes me as being a touch simple. Then again, most people in our place strike me as simpletons. Only Darren covers it well with his big talk and attempts at being imposing. Ah well, Viva la Jack! Or Jaqcues as he enthused me to call him tonight...

22 May
Bow before the king of nights
I am mighty slayer of chilled things, drinks, pet food, things in tins, tea, coffee, sugar, crisps, breakfast cereals, sweets, biscuits, health and beauty. Lyndon is slayer of alcohol and out of date things. Now, if I could just be slayer of Lyndon...

I had the warehouse thrashed by 4am. Not bad considering I also did the chiller. I even had time to read a few suppliments. And smoke 6 cigarettes. And drink 3 cups of coffee. Am I good or what?

And Laura fears me. We like this. I think she has been put firmly in place by my rant last Sunday. So she should too. Tonight she timidly came over and said "ummm...you're down for another 6 day week, is that going to be a problem?" and I just said "no, as long as you give me a lieu day for every 6 day week, it's fine". Then later she said "I'm not asking you to work anything, but could you move that charcoal from the top of that cage? I tried yesterday but it was too high and too heavy for me." I obligingly did it. Chirply. Then danced down the corridor past a highly bemused Lyndon and Laura, then danced back past them with a freshly purchased bottle of water which I was throwing around like a majorette's throwy stick. And then I crushed Lyndon's whole "I am supervisor, hear me roar" act. Laura said she'd teach him how to do wastage, so I commented I could teach him. After a small conversation about how I knew how to, I stated I was a Jack of all trades. Lyndon snidely said "yeah, but a master of none". Come forth new defender of Jack - Laura!!!!!

"I don't think that's called for Lyndon. He has been working here for 18 months, he does know things"

You could almost see the rage being created inside his simple little mind. Rage that had already developed from his underling thrashing the warehouse and generally being better than him in every way possible.

So now I do the dance of being great, the dance of being Mr 4 days off quite soon, the dance of Lyndon is an idiot, the dance of bring on tonight's delivery night, and the dance of goodnight, I'm going to bed!

21 May
I am Jack, hear me kill Lyndon!
Grrrrrrrr...I am not impressed. Lyndon, the little shitstirrer, did bugger all tonight. Me and Tizz thrashed that delivery. I got 142 cases of stuff out in an hour and a half. 94 cases an hour! Could I have gone any faster? I mean really? Laura is hearing about this. Hey, maybe she already has...maybe she's read this and done something.

Allow me to clarify to the uninitiated. Our store is tiny. it has 4 aisles, a little bakery, and 4 checkouts. We sell petrol, and we get deliveries every night apart from Saturdays. Now normally, we get around 200 cases per night (1 case being a box of something). So 94 boxes of stuff an hour is pretty damned speedy. Especially as the company expects only 45 and 30-35 at night.

So Lyndon isn't being expected to do a lot...but he can't even manage the basics. Hell, Tizzy had to talk him through a refund...but more on that later

The thing that gets me is this - he dares go to Laura and tell her we talk too much, that he feels he was alone on the shift. Then the next shift he is in charge, he does sod all. Me and Tizz are sick of carrying his moron. We had it with Dave, we've got it with Malcolm, and I've had enough. Revenge won't be in the form of little mind tricks. Well...it will...just directed at different people in different ways. I have a knack of putting vivid mental images in people's minds. Laura and Lyndon will realise this, and Tizzy already knows about it Just ask her about Malcolm and his shoe fetish and his wanting her alone in the racking if you ever meet her. You won't need to tell her who told you

So, what now? Well, I think I need to get across to Laura how slow he really is. And I think I know how to do this. I'm going to appeal to Laura's good side. I know she has one, and I know she respects me for sticking with the company for so long. So here is my plan. Tonight, I go in and ask for a chat alone with her. I'll tell her I've taken on board what she and Lyndon said about Sunday night, and on reflection maybe I did talk too much to Tizzy. Therefore I made a concerted effort to not talk to Tizzy, and to work harder and faster. And in reward Lyndon didn't work very hard at all, which ended up with me and Tizzy feeling quite angry and frustrated because we'd made the effort to step up our game, and he seemed to have relaxed his. Plus I'll use my mastery of body language to make it all look better.

Anyway, must finish this. Have to finish chatting to a close, old friend of mine.

20 May
Roll on Sunday or Wedneday
Depending on if I have Sunday off or not, Roll on Sunday! I've just discovered via Darren Brown the way to do a fantastic trick I've been trying to do for a long time. Getting my friend stoned without him taking a single puff.

All my attempts have failed in the past, although now I think I've figured out why. Just a shame I can't use it on Lyndon...

I'm so good
<sits back with feet up and a very smug grin> I'm just great. 80 cases an hour average, got revenge on Lyndon without him even realising, and the store looked great because I faced it up. Oh, and three hundred and something case delivery took us and hour and a half.

Again, pretty uneventful night. Did lots, did it quickly and still managed to sneak my revenge onto Lyndon without anyone noticing - no details yet, sorry.

One thing I must comment on though, Lyndon tried to give me a talking to over Sunday night. It was the funniest thing I've ever been part of. He started all serious and full of gusto, and as soon as he realised I wasn't intimidated for a minute, which took all of 30 seconds, he just cornered down into ending every sentence with "you know sort of thing". Hillarious. And this from a man who claimed to be "pretty peeved".

The best bit of the night? Me and Lyndon acting all buddy buddy. I think he sincerely is trying to move on from being the big bad wolf. Shame I'm not so forgiving, and I am the big bad wolf.

Anyway, I did much bragging to Lyndon, telling him how I found thrashing that delivery easy and how he could expect a repeat performance tomorrow. He left it with the almost threat of "well, you'd better". Or what Lynda? Huh? You'll go tell Aunty Laura? That'd be a bad move. I intend to be fully Jack tomorrow night and if he says a damned bad word to anyone, they'll be informed of how he's slow, how he doesn't rotate, how he doesn't face up the chilled as he goes along like everyone else, and how he doesn't motivate us, just threatens us. He has no idea of what we did to David, and he should be very glad of that.

19 May
Why do i drink?
I'm such a mess right now. I feel like death warmed up. And last night was pretty messy too.

I tried getting Mike and Hiwan together. All night. Hiwan was so up for it, but Mike wasn't, and was getting quite uncomfortable about it. Then we almost got into a fight with some guy who Mike was hell bent on fighting. Warren ended up chasing him down the road and scaring him off. Mike and Warrenn then spent the rest of the walk home talking about fighting and stuff. So pointless. And for some reason, Warren kept having a dig at me.

Then me and Mike went back to mine, ate our kebabs and I promptly fell asleep. He woke me up when he left. I was so drunk when I stood up. I could barely stand!

And I was violently ill a few minutes after I got to bed. Not good.

It makes me wonder why I drink. There have got to be better ways of relaxing. I mean, is it really worth drinking? I felt ill at the end of the night, I feel ill now, so I pretty much wasted my day off. Sigh. What is the answer?

18 May
I am so happy!
I am more overjoyed than I was when I left work! I just checked the post and my new Derren Brown DVD has arrived! Fantastic! Ok, now going to go watch it, and learn new tricks to use at the bar tonight, and hopefully also use on Lyndon! Hahahahahaha!

Oh, and in case Darren and Laura are reading this, this DVD is essentially a refresher course for me. It's stuff I've learnt but forgotten. I know much more than just what is on the DVDs and TV shows

2 hours later...
Well, I've just finished watching the DVD and it was fantastic! I learnt a few more tricks, nothing to really use on Lyndon, but there are a couple I'll be trying out down the pub tonight. And I've just tried out a modified version of one on the poor little welsh boy who sold me his soul on eBay. I will watch him with interest! See if I can find his blog...if he has one!

I am Jack, hear me mew
Hahahaha! We are so good! We started working the delivery at 2:45am, by 4:20am we were finished! We absolutely thrashed it! And the best bit? I talked for ages. So, Laura and Darren, since I suspect you both read this blog, stick that in your pipes and smoke it! Or in Darren's case, borrow someone else's pipe and smoke it

Right now, I am back on top form, thrashing any Ambient which comes my way, and I don't intend stopping. And on Thursday night, lil' Lyndon is gonna get a masterclass in being shown up in the case rate stakes. I worked out tonight that I worked 72 cases in 75 minutes. And that's nowhere near my best.

That might have been due to Tizzy's disturbing admission earlier in the night that she'd been daydreaming about what would happen if she chatted to me on MSN in full on submissive mode. Oh, and I was also quite freaked out by the breast rubbing and jiggling. However, viva la twins! Ahahahahaha! (sorry, manic laughter was required!)

Apart from that, not a lot else happened. Lots of standing around being bored. Toying with Louise... Oh, and I must mention much development on the Louise front. I think Tizzy is now more than free to "poach" her. I've been wondering for about a month if she's even interested in me, and today I got my answer. I read her body language when she saw me for the first time this morning. Not an iota of interest coming across. Even with a steaming cup of Coffee in my hand. So, I think it's more than safe to say that my gf is safe from the evil clutches of Louise.

And in other store based news today, I had to go back to fetch my wine. Which incidentally cost me only £2.53 a bottle, down from £4 a bottle. Anyway, I went back, and Gorgeous was in. I tried sooooo hard to avoid him, because I know him and Jack would get on like oil and water. I failed, he clocked me. He asked why I was there and I said I'd come back to get my wine, to which he demanded to know if I had a receipt. I said it was in the wine carrier and he just grunted in semi-approval. Yes ladies and gentlemen, this is the charming man we all know and love as Darren aka Gorgeous George.

So, a day off in which to learn more about my method of revenge. I always find mental punishment to be so much more efficient than anything physical. And if you can combine the two, fantastic. And the best part of my revenge is that I won't lay a finger on The Traitor, yet I could very well end up hospitalising him solely due to my revenge tactic

Anyone sympathising with The Traitor shouldn't. He went behind my back on two occasions and has gotten me into deep trouble with senior management, and for this he must be punished. He enraged Jack and that's just plain stupid. In the words of Tizzy describing me when I was full on Jack - "You're just nasty! So, so nasty!"

17 May
More business bits
Just finished doing a little recoding to my business site. It's looking pretty good right now! Tonight I'll finish off recoding the product pages so that people can buy stuff from my site, then send the site off to all the search engines. Hopefully a link on here will help too.

It's not looking too bad. Might tweak things here and there later, but for now it's all good. It's funny, when I was reading the futurology report about virtual businesses I thought "that's ridiculous, how could that ever work?" and now I'm running a virtual business. I have no stock, I do no posting of items, Amazon does all that for me, and pays me for it. Right now, I have spent absolutely no money on this business, yet once it's on the search engines, it should be fairly successful. I mean, if you have the spare cash, who wouldn't want a slice of future technology?

Of course, the other upside is that whenever I want to make my catalogue bigger, it's just a few clicks here and there, a little coding and that's all I do. The site even does my inventory for me, so no complicated, time consuming stocktaking. And if I ever do want employees, there is no stock for them to steal, because it's all stored at Amazon.

Viva la futurology entreprenurs!

Jack is BACK!
I'm so good. 58 boxes of stuff in an hour. And the delivery was only one hundred and seventy something. We were done in an hour. Then again, this is what happens when you have an efficient leader who doesn't just motivate his team, he generates high morale and team spirit. This is the thing with Kev, he's nuts. He'll joke with you, blantently take the mickey out of you, and when it comes to the work, he'll slog his guts out and expect the same from you whilst joking. He's also very good when it comes to cigarette breaks, but then, he is a smoker.

Actually, a pretty uneventful night. Everything was done way ahead of schedule, everything turned up on time, and we mightily annoyed Darren by having the store immaculate by the time he came in, and leaving annoyingly chirpy.

However, despite all this, despite having a fantastic night, I'm still thinking of leaving. I'll never get anywhere in that store. I won't get promoted, they won't even make me supervisor of nights, so they're not going to make me anything else. I mean, I've worked there for 18 months and I've been told I won't be promoted ever. Lyndon has been there 3 weeks, and he's already night shift supervisor. Although, I'm planning on making his life such an agonising misery that he won't want to stay.

This is the upside of having a nasty yet intensely creative chemically created alternate personality. When it comes to payback, you can be sure it's not going to be the ordinary revenge or in any way expected. As Tizzy well knows from our lil lover's tiffs ;-) :-p

16 May
I hate my job
Why did I ever volunteer to work in that shithole? I mean, I did volunteer. They offered me a job and I took it. It's something I've been regretting every single day since.

Ok, so the money is nice. It funds my research. But then...so did the paltry £50 a week from the Job Centre. Not that I am much closer to reaching my aim of gaining normality with Autistic traits intact.

So, why do I hate this job? Well, mainly, the people. I must have accidentally ticked the box "backstabbing creep" on my application form, because the place is full of them. In fact, almost everyone who works there is a backstabber. I don't think Tizzy is, and I don't think Kev is, but everyone else? For sure. Take Lyndon. Not just a backstabber, but a coniving, spineless, arrogant, nasty piece of work. On the surface, he seems nice. He seems ok. But...I got told by Laura the Moron this morning that he felt like he was alone on the shift. That we didn't contribute. Damn him to all hell. He is not that fast himself. Ok, so I chatted, I chatted a lot, in my opinion, I did chat too much, but I also worked at the same time. But in the last 2 hours, he had the alcohol left to do. There was NOT a lot, maybe 50 cases. He didn't get it done. Then he whinges that I'm not working hard enough. Ass hole. He'd better not think there won't be concequences to this. There will be. He has made himself on enemy of mine today.

Plus, Laura the Moron says that if I have a case rate of 60-70 an hour, then I could get deliveries done on my own in a couple of hours. Ok - since when have we had a 120-140 case delivery? Idiot.

Personally, I'm very tempted to take the store to court over discrimincation. I cannot work the tills, I've tried. I'm slow as all hell and get very confused by the money and remembering the sequences of buttons to press. So, they "allow" me to work as a shelf stacker. So gracious of you my lieges. However, I've been told outright that I will not be promoted at any time, because I cannot use a till. Do they think I'm deliberately trying to be difficult? Do they think I like feeling useless when there is only me on the shop floor and I have to disturb what someone is busy doing to get them to serve? Because I don't. I hate it. All my life I have been independent, and now I have to rely on other people.

Right now, I have no idea what to do. Twice in two days I've been told if I want to walk, they'll just say "bye" and I don't have to come back. Sounds good, but then I have no money for 6 months. No holidays, not even in the UK. No mad afternoons drinking until midnight.

But if I stay, what happens? Two arguments with Laura in 2 days. How long will that go on for? Lyndon evidently taking a dislike to me. Well he's going to be fun to work with from now. Muppet, he's really going to get what's coming to him. No Kevin on nights for much longer, although I might be able to sort that out. Malcolm running the show, with his brand of hating me.

Maybe I should go sleep. Perhaps things will look brighter in the evening. Right now, every possibility is there in front of me. Staying, quitting, just leaving the country altogether...

One thing is certain though. I'm not leaving that place until my vengeance on Lyndon. I won't say how, I won't say when, because who knows who reads this. Maybe Lyndon does. I already suspect Malcolm does. And yes Tizz, I know you do!

Anyway, going to bed. I've already got stage 1 of a cunning idea. Not for Lyndon, for me.